Why I Am A Sex-Positive Feminist, Now In Bullet Point Form

In random bullet points because it’s late and I’m sleepy but I had to write:

  • I hate the word prude. I hate it like fire.
  • I hate the word slut. I hate it like fire.
  • I am kinky. This is not a bad thing. I like knowing that.
  • Being sex-positive involves acknowledging that the way this society, and more than that feminism, deals with sex and sexuality just doesn’t work.
  • Sexuality =/= Sex
  • There is no one way to be sexy.
  • There is no one way to have (or not have) sex.
  • Consent. Fuck yeah!

And more reasons in this gorgeous post here at The Pervocracy.

Also sex-positive feminism has a long way to go, especially with race politics.

Okay, back to bed.


Feminist, Pro-Sex, Celibate, and sub (Why These Words Aren’t Mutually Exclusive)

It all starts and ends with the big C.


And you know what? I credit feminism with my own understanding of why consent matters. Feminism gave me the tools to exercise and build my agency, helped me learn not only about the power to say “NO!” but to also say “YES!”. Loud, unashamed, hair pulling, toe-curling, yes! It taught me why the media doesn’t love my body, its blackness, its thickness, and explained in the simplest terms why the media is wrong. Feminism gave me the tools to look in the mirror and form healthy opinions about my body, my sexuality, and my self.

Which is why it cuts a bit when this same feminism that opened up these possibilities, chooses to police me. Here I thought feminism supported my right to my own choices, my own decisions about my body, but suddenly certain consensual choices are a threat to feminism?
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